no more hope...its over

 

this is maybe  last post...i dont know if i will carry on...i was told by Anna, over, she said, its over, total over, that must go out of her life, that she doesnt want me..i must disapear from her life...she dont want me to be close to her...never to see her again... that she will not answer my phone calls, that she will delete my number.....i dont have any hope...so i move...i will disappear...i close my eyes, my heart and move away

this is not a post, no...its is a declaration of love for the person i always will love, this is a cry...a shout....i told her about this blog, she told she doesnt want to know...she doesnt want to read it...but will write this last post for her....this is all the things that are running in my mind:

My Dearest Anna

My love, my light..my life....life is a long strange process...I am walking out from your life, I do it because I don't want to be a source of stress, of distress for you I don't do it in anger, or hate, I have no bad feelings in my heart, I love you, you know this, I have no regrets, I love you, I am your friend, and you will always have a place in my heart and in my life, and if we cross each other, I hope you come to me and say hi, I will be always your friend!!!!!...I am not stopping being your friend...I am not stopping loving you....I will never stop being your friend, this is for ever!!! I will not delete your phone number, I will see that pictures of you that I have at home, I will not stop wearing the things you gave me, I hope you keep me in your heart has a  good thing in your life!!!...your eyes will be free from me, but I hope that you still have a place in your mind, and a little corner in your heart for me, I am just moving to the side to give you all the space you need, I don't want to be a source of any pressure, stress, discomfort, sadness to you, I love you too much for that, I am going in the shadow of life so you can enjoy the full sun of life....

I want you to be happy, I don't want to see your face in stress because we are together in a place...maybe one day you can realise how great I would have been to you, how amazing we could have been together....I am here...I have no kids, I have no story...I am just here for you...I love you more them any person in this planet, you will find more handsome guys them me, taller, younger, richer, but you will never will find someone who will love as much as me, you are my reason to life, you are not my second, 3 priority, you and your child are my only priority...but this is not enough...my love was no sufficient...

I am not from your country…no...I am another country...I never consider where you born, the country on your passport was important, I always think that the love you have is important, I am not my brother, my father, your father, our language teacher husband...I am just me, someone who loves you, truly, and with me you would have someone who would be your partner for ever, you would never leave, that would be there for you ever and ever. that would always have love you for ever...I don't cheat, I don't play games, I am honest...I have pure love...I dream to walk you to alter,  to wait for you to arrive in a white dress, in a church, to marry you...that I would ever see your love bring us a child, to be able to caress our child and tell him or her stories about my sailing times, or how beautiful you are, about we grow old together, do runs together, and walk in the park, see you getting white hair, and tell who beautiful you are, to prove to all around us that love can conquer all, that not every one ends in a divorce, end with a broken heart, I would prove that life can be a beautiful journey of two people side by side, i would do an effort every day to make you laugh, smile  every day, to make you feel special…to give you feet massages when you are 75 and your feet will hurt, with me life is simple, its just me loving you, nothing more, love...and total dedication...I would want all of that, I would want to marry you, to have a kid with you, but life had other plans....i had bough an engage ring, i had had everything ready, but life change the plans, the ring and box lie in the botton of the sea, in your country, in a place you took me there,  a place i go to feel close to you..

I know the person who is helping you gave lots of advice, get a man from your country....I am surprised...she should have said, get someone you love you, you respect, who will be there for you, someone you can trust, if you ask something, you know it will be done...who is honest, who doesn't play games, who doesn't cheat, you makes you laugh...no..your country....what about, dedication? tenderness? put the interest of the love one in front of his??? are this not important? and if she was giving advice on me, she should at decency of talk to me once....she doesn't know who I an now, what I feel, what I believe in...and another thing, i was told ...dont let other pople make decisions for you, not making judgement, and she told me also...this help should last in maximum 6 months, after that its no good....she told me after six months you need to move in your own...if you stay for long, she told, people starting playing the "God" role, where they start molding the person in their way....so free yourself Anna...live for you without fear, life with passion...

Maybe one day...when your child move out, when you are looking at am empty house, and you are no sure about your relationship...you would take look back in your life....you see the guys, the persons who touch your life, see how they love you, see who was there for you everytime, even when they knew that they were not your priority...how important you were for them, how much they love you...and you going to realise...I am, would be the perfect man for you, with me you know you are always top priority, I am always, and will be, there for you, i would be there not to make decision for you, not to patronise you, but to be your rock, to support your decisions...I am always try to make you laugh, I am always trying to make your life easier, more happy, maybe I try to much, I know I am too pushy sometimes...I do this not because you cannot stand on your on, you can, you stand on our own, I do this to prove my love to you, sometimes in a too much way...I will never patronise you, I am not trying to save you...I am just trying to share and help, to share, to make your life more easy....I do all this because I love you so much!!!

My grandmother still prays for you and your child every day, she will not stop...even today I tol her to pray even more for you and your child, she have a photo of you and your child, she still says,...my little girls!! she will pray for you for ever...and I will keep praying for you also, until the day I die.......you will always be in my heart!! and in the heart of my family...

did I forget the fights we had? I have them in my mind...I see them every day, I know how much I would be different now...did I forget the fact I didn't move here when you did?? no....but you cannot even understand, you not even grasp how much I am sorry, you cannot even imagine the pain I have in my heart, when I think about this things, this changed me...pain can make you a bitter, sad person, or make you a better person...it made me a better person, to me pain made me grow up, it made me see my mistakes, I had a long hard look at me, about what I think was right and wrong, how the true importance of things, it made look at me and ask myself, how I truly was as person, was I good or not? and start in me a process of change...a revolution in how I feel...you where afraid that I will be bad for you??? that if we would go back we would face the some old problems??? no, we wouldn't, because I am not the same person, you cannot even guess how different how life would be...how you me and your child would be, I learn a lot about me, I learn a lot how to raise a child, to be a part of family, how language was a barrier and separation?? you told me not to learn your language for you....I didn't start learning your language for you, no, I started learning your language so i could speak with your child, so language would never be a barrier between us again...so we can all be together and share a laugh a joke...but...

I hope just one thing, I wish just one thing...that is way I am moving to the side....I want you to be happy...your happiness is everything to me, I want you to be happy, that you can enjoy life, that every thing you wish will come true, I will continue my life, I am here for me, so I will not return to my country...not for now, I will move with my life....

my love for you will not stop the day I die...they say, true love never dies, if you die with true love in your heart you will see your love one in Heaven, to see how much I love you, if I God told me, if He say...you will have to die right now so Anna can be happy for ever, I would die for you, no need to think, not need consider anything, I would do it pleasure, I would only ask one thing, please...make the life of Anna as much happy as I wish and wanted it for her...I can do this because I don't have a heart with several people on it, my heart has only place for you, so there wouldn't nothing to think about...I love you, just you...I just love you, more them anything so I would die in peace and in joy, this is because I love you! so much!!

I don't regret nothing, if you one day you think about all the persons in your life, you will see that only one truly love you, only one was there for you, who can always count, do to a little thing, to do a big thing, who was patient, who listen to you, you respect and admire you, who loved you even after you didnt't want him, my love for you is unconditional, it was no account, no plan, no second ideas, it is pure, its true, I have pure and true love for you...

how will be the future? I don't know...I know one thing is we cross, in here, in your country, in my country in any place, I will walk to you, I will kiss and I will say hi!!!  I have no regrets,you always will be special for me, this means today, in 5 years, in 10...for ever!!! I will be your friend for life, you will always be the love of my life...if we meet, the first thing i will want to know is...are you happy? if you are happy, even if not with me, you dont need to say anything more...just that you are happy...

if I knew today...how we would be my path with you, how much I would suffer...and was asked, you can live everything again, but cannot change nothing, you will know how it will end, you cannot correct the situation.....you will be in pain....that i would see the tears coming down from my own face…that I know I would not sleep. That I lose more them 10 kg....the desperation, the feeling of lost, the walk in hell...i would remember instead the love, the little notes you put in my bed, I would remember my little mermaid, my sexy agent99, I will remember troia, I will remember our car travels, I would remember giving you all the massages, me asking you do all this mental calculations while you drive to keep you distracted, i would remember you asking if i want tea after diner, i would remember your smile, i would remember you running much better and faster them me, I would remember kissing you, I would remember put a blanket in your child before we would go to bed, would remember holding your hand, I would remember the touch of head in my chest in the mornings, there is so much joy in my heart with you that if I would go back to that magic day in the castle and I even would kiss with more passion that I kiss you on that day!!!!! You are the best thing in my life!!!! nothing will change that!

you know me, my place, my phone, my house, I will always will be there for you...if you day who think...I should give ..... a call, but its been 5 years....10 years...doesnt matter....just call. Don't even hesitate one second, I will be always so happy to talk to you, to see you, to be with you, to have a coffee with you...

I will spend the rest of my life asking God one thing...that Anna will love me one day again....

MY love for you is eternal, you are my love, my passion, my soul is yours, its yours since the first day i saw you, you will be always in my heart, so goodbye, my love, light of my eyes and heart.....

Parties

Parties....i have attend a few in my last 3 months, i meet people...i am was invitade for a few parties, i go out, i almost force myself to go out, i keep going out, but i think its just to escape the feeling of being alone at home.

Anna ask if i see some one...i say yes and no....its true...i see other people, but not in that sense, i dont feel nothing, every time i go out i feel bad, i think about Anna all the time, i ask myself what the hell i am doing there...i went for a while to this thrusdays parties...i remember..i was in one..and all i feel, what i could think was about Anna...i left, i never return, some of my friends, my colleagues keep going, i hear all the time....hey..come on, there is nice women in there...but i dont go!!!

last week i went to wine tasting, two very nice looking italian girls come talk to me...and we talk a bit..and when i decide to leave...it was not that late, around 23.00, one girl ask me..hey, dont you want our phone number...i couldnt remember anything to say....i just said...i am sorry, but i am not free....

i am not free...i am out of the market, and this is not good, because i have not a person waiting for me, i dont have no one to love me, and yet i am not free...i have only one place in my heart...

i keep asking myself, i sould go out, go out, enjoy the life...but what is the point if i dont have any good feelings from going out??? i am starting to go back to what i felt in 2003,2004...i get more and more focus in closing down my pain, i am starting to push hard again in the gym, i push hard, them i have huge pain after, but i dont care...i almost shave my head yesterday, it would have been a monster shock in my office...i am close to that...my colleagues who dont know me very well, they see me, they think i am ok, they have a vision of me, maybe that i "promote" that is not who i am truly, there is a lot more about me them they see, yes, i laugh....i smile...but i cannot say i am happy..i am not sad either...i am in a sort of limbo....for every day that i lost hope before i always regain a bit of hope after...i am losing all hope now...day after day....

so going to parties is not going to make me any happier...i need to deal with this in my own terms, i need to get a clean mind...i had a long look at me...why i write??? why i write this blog??? maybe my biggest reason...even if never want to considered it...was i hopping one day Anna would found this blog...and realise how much i have to offer....how much i love her...

is this very childish??? maybe she would read and say...nice words...but i dont feel nothing...i dont know...i know i will stop going out for a while...i need to be thinking about what is good for me...what is important for my life....how i will live my life in the future....

wish i could write in the future a post saying...i am so happy...i have hope...but i dont think so....

if you are in the same situation, dont go out just to go out, dont drink just to drink...dont go and pretend you are having fun, be honest with yourself...listen to your heart...if your heart say..stay home...stay home..this is not having pitty of yourself...not be sorry for yourself...no...its staying home and have a good time...have a nice meal, read a good book...sleep a good night...it means go out...but to the beach, to country, to cinema...its about feel your life with things that you feel confortable..and them you can smile...you can say....i am honest with me...i could go out, get some girls...take them home...i wouldnt be any happier..i would had sex..yes...but not make me a happy person...we shouldnt follow just the instant gratification...we should be more deep as persons...we should have values, honor, respect, virtude...

life is not a simple process...but i need to be honest...with me...so i will stop going to parties....i will be honest with my own feelings...i maybe never be with Anna again....but in my heart she will always be there for me!!!

what do i wish?

What do i wish every day??? do i wish for fame and fortune??? no, i simply wish to happy, to enjoy every day i have, to have a laugh, to smile, to feel i am important to some one, that people care, that i have friends, that i have a life that means something, that in the day i die i can die in peace with myself, that i regret nothing, and that i touch the life of some people.

I wish every day for love to touch me, my heat is full of love, i am totaly in love, but its just me...i wish every day that person who i love would love me back...i wish that i can have a reason to come home better them just to rest...

i wish that life is not giving more tests, a friend of mine recently told me, life only test the strong ones, the more is your love, the bigger is the challenge, i wish that this challenge stopped, that i had done enough to prove my love and dedication!!!

i wish that i could be looking at a new house to share with my love, to see paint for the wall, to see furniture...and whe in fact i did all that a few years ago...i didnt express the joy, i didnt show the necessary atention, i let it pretend i didnt care that much, maybe i was to blaze, why???? why??? because i didnt even realise how precious this moments are, i didnt even realise that when you are building a new life you should enjoy every little moment...i was selfish, i was imature...i learn my lesson...i pay the ultimate price, my love!!!

i wish that people who are in the same situation as i was before do dont do the same mistake...learn, if you do what i promise to do, you will make your better half a very happy person, but this cannot be forced, you cannot do things because they simply look good, you have to feel them, your heart must be pure, you must be honest...

i wish i didnt see what i see every day, every day i see, listen, to stories of cheating, of affairs...people dont care to much today about others, they are to center in their own satisfaction, have you love??? have you a person you love?? them dont cheat....if you find love in some one...them break everything, take risk, but be honest, be true...you cannot have two loves, you cannot have two lives...love is singular!!!

i wish from my heart i could start back with Anna, to start a new fresh start, to fill her life with love, to share her problems, to help simplify her life, to be at her side to fight the problems, to share the happpniess, to marry her, to have kids, to grow old, to be at able to look at her every day, to simply be able to call and say, i love my sweetheart!!!!

i wish this would happen...but i dont know, i wish i that didnt had the feeling in heart that i am a past page in Annas book, that i have no change in her future...i wish God would stop punish me, i suffer to much in the last two years, i use to joke, it was drinking person, i would be drank every day, if i was suicidal, i would have killed myself last year...

but no, i fight on, i fight with all my heart, i fight with all my soul, but every day i feel more distant...more lost...

i wish that one day, i could arrive home and had Anna waiting for me, she has the key of my apartment in here, this is one of my biggest wishes, i would return home and i would had Anna waiting for me, to say...let give a new try....i fall a sleep most nights think about this....

i wish that my life was full, full with love, full with joy, full with the person i love, is this to much to wish for???

music

we all have a music, a video, a moment that will always remember your love, there will be that magic song, that sound that remembers all the great moments, the person, that magic touch...we us..for me is this two concerts we been together in different stages of our lifes...jamie cullum and micheal bubble...i have very strong memories of this concerts...i will never for the rest of my life listen to a music from this artists and not remember Annna..

during my "junkie" phase...i couldnt listen to any song..any music who talk about love and lost...i would be so sad..sometimes i had tears rolling down my face in this times...i was not good....i recover...i can listen to music...i can survive..

music is a way we related to every day, they remember of stages of our life, of moments, of feelings..some make us smile...take to our youth...others make us feel that the world is over...

I dont use videos, music in here, but i sometimes feel this song was written to me, its a perfect expression of what i feel, of what i promise to do, to be there, i mean what i say, i would die for Anna and her child, there is no if or buts in this statment, i dont make promise i not honor!!!

if i say something i will do it, its not the easy way, its the only way, never promise anything, that you are not going to to!!!

this is a one off post, a short with a song, to express my feelings, to express what see in life!!! I will be always there for my love, I will be always here for Anna.

i can relate to this song...i can feel what this song says...i feel the same...as long i am alive i will be waiting...i will be waiting even when there will no hope...i will be waiting even when i say i am not...i will be for ever wait...why??? why??? i am a sucker for pain?? for misery?? no....i am not...but i have a love, a true love...some one who is everything to me...the person who have my soul....so how i stop waiting?? i cannot...i will wait for ever!!!

I love Anna, for ever!!!

He broke your heart
He took your soul
You're hurt inside
'cause there's a hole
You need some time
To be alone
Then you will find
What you've always known

I'm the one who really loves you baby
I've been knocking at your door

As long as I'm living, I'll be waiting
As long as I'm breathing, I'll be there
Whenever you call me, I'll be waiting
Whenever you need me, I'll be there

I've seen you cry
Into the night
I feel your pain
Can I make it right ?
I realize there's no end in sight

Yet still I wait
For you to see the light

I'm the one who really loves you baby
I can't take it anymore

As long as I'm living, I'll be waiting
As long as I'm breathing, I'll be there
Whenever you call me, I'll be waiting
Whenever you need me, I'll be there

You are the only one I've ever known
That makes me feel this way
Girl you are my own
I wanna be with you until we're old

You've got the love you need right in front of you
Please come home

As long as I'm living, I'll be waiting
As long as I'm breathing, I'll be there
Whenever you call me, I'll be waiting
Whenever you need me, I'll be there

i will always will be here for you, Anna!!

missing

There as things we miss, we all complain about missing something, maybe the sun, the rain, the hot days, the snow, the going to the beach, the calmer days of holidays, we all miss this things, but they are not big things to miss...

the big things to miss is not money, its not fancy jobs, is missing the people, the love, the people who are realy important for you, the people who touch your heart.

I miss Anna every day, its like i say in the blog, its not the time since i last saw her, its the time i am doing something and miss her...i miss when i wake up and there is no one there at my side, i miss her when i wake up during the night and look at my side and there is no one there....i miss her when i arrive home, i miss listen to hear voices, hear her telling how was her day at work...i miss hearing the voice of her child...i miss not see them...not see her smile, not see her child...no hear her child laugh....i miss give her foot massages...i miss kissing her....touching her..i miss my better half...i miss the person who is everything to me!!!

I have to learn life with the fact i maybe will never...cook for them again, that i will not able to listen to their stories, to hold them, to make them a tea, get an ice cream, to put a blanket on Anna when she was cold...i will miss being there for them, try to make them laugh with my crazy stories, i will miss not be able to see the child of my love grow up, i will miss see my love happy when the sun was up and was nice and hot, i will miss her going to the beach with me, i will miss her eyes, her smile...i will see her beautiful face...

i had hopes when i start this blog that i one day would be in Anna hearts, i would be her love...i miss this hope every day that passes by...hope that i wouldnt had to miss all of this, that i would be able to be there for them, every day, until the day i would die, that i would be able to share their lifes, to fix their bikes, to go to the supermarket, to make my love a nice surprise bath in the winter, to buy her little flowers, to take to places where she would be surprised, to plan our weeding, to see her in a church, to have kids, to be a family...

i am so different today from what i was, and yet i am so close to be what i was, the good parts are all here, and life show me the importance of love, of what is important, what i should be to the women i love...the things that where not good, they are now over...i am a so much better person...

I hope is one day i will miss nothing, i mean the realy important thing, i hope that one day, i can have a perfect day, this is come home and cook a surprise dinner for and Anna and her child, knowing that in a few minutes my wife, Anna and her child will arrive, them i know that i am not missing nothing in my life!!!

Pain

I have pain in my heart, its tough, i feel that i am losing all hope, that my life is a mess, that i will never be Anna special person again...that i will not kiss her lips...never to hear again...i love you!!! i cannot blame Anna, she never lie to me...she was never unfair to me, she was always honest with me, she didnt promise me nothing...she told me she didnt love any more a few months ago...she ask me not to have any expectations...

But...i was thinking, if i come to life in the same city, same country as her, if i show her how much i changed, now much i love her, how the the things that makes us separete were over...i would had a change...i would have possibility of start a little spark in her heart, to make her slowly feel something for me...to have a tiny chance of love...

and because of this....i let hope...i let ilusion enter my hear, for while i try to say to myself....i will be just her friend...i will be her friend...i have no agenda...no plan....i try...i am being honest...when i promise this to Anna, i was not liying, i was being honest, i was being truth, but as i see her...when i see her...its like magic....its like for that time there is just happniess in in heart...i feel so good...its like in that moment i know...there is a God....because only the time i am with her...its a sign...a show...a prove...there must a heaven some where...when i die one day...i hope my heaven will be with Anna for eternity...but this is just to say...i felt for her....the love in my heart come back like a monster wave....i am totaly lost....i love Anna...she is the women of my life...no...there was no promises...no...i will give you a second chance...no

this week i had a reality check...i cannot see her child...i volunteer to babyseat her child so she can go to the gym...she said no...she doesnt want to confuse her child...i understand...but this also means...i dont have any hope to play a role in their lifes...we talk a bit about the past...i was very close to tears...and we are having a formal dinner with other people....yes...she went to have dinner with me...why?? i hope because likes my companion...that i am good "force" in her life...i hope not for pity...not for "charity"...but i was very close to cry in a dinner with people i know...it was tough...and she told me...too late...this words cut like a knife...if some one had stab me...i think with i would suffer less...

i have pain...i have despair..and my first reaction on the way home..was to start to think...why she is doing this to me????? but i realise...she is not doing nothing to me...she was always honest with me...i am doing things to myself...i am start to see things and take them to a different meaning...i am the one creating a "film" in my mind...this is the true...i am the one to blame...i let my mind create expectations...ideas...

in fact we all do this...but i cannot blame Anna...i love her...yes...i love her...so much!!!! but i need to start learning to life with the fact...that maybe love is not enough...that i am will be in love with her for the rest of my life...but i have to find a way to life without her..

how??? i dont know...i dont have a clue...i dont have any idea...how can you carry on living without the person you love more them everything???? you just go day by day...one day at the time...i will try to fill each day with things that give me pleasure...that i can smile...that i can find a way to laugh...and hope one day...maybe...she would find in her heart...the flame of my love...

so...dont blame other for something its your fault...be fair...be real...be honest...when we love we lose track of reality...but be a man...be women...and accept your responsabilty!!!!!

i have pain...yes...a lot...but i will know that i can endure this pain...i know that right know i am bruise...i am broken...but i am not down...i am not a person who will quit...i will be here...i will carry on fighting, for my happiness...for my life...for Anna.

looking for the one!

All my life i was in search of this special person, the love of my life, the one!!! maybe it was to many stories i was told when i was a kid, about knights and the value of love in the making of great things!!! i dont know, i know every time i would go to place, i would always ask my self will be here i will meet my one??

i meet lots of girls, i felt love, i felt pain, i felt anger, i felt happiness, but not was the one, they would touch my life, and i see their faces, know their names, i smile, i even the ones i have no reasons to smile, but none was the one...

how do you know??? how to you know this person is the one for you??? what magic tricker this person have in your heart, that you dont want any one else???? i can only speak for me, what i see around me, what i listen, with my friends, my family, the people at work, at the gym, its a very different story, its just words, you can say its the one...say its easy, you can say what ever you want, but how you act is a very different thing!!!

how can i say, can say Anna is the one??? its so easy, i smile every time i thing about her, i always think about her when i am happy, when i see some thing i like, when i go to sleep, when i wake, i always think of her, when i see a little kid, i always think, how would look a kid from me and Anna, when i remember the best moments of my life, they are all with Anna!!! i dont want any body else to share my life, she makes me feel special, she makes me do good things, she brings the best in me, she is my star in the sky that guides me, i could go on, she is holder of my soul!!!

when i am with her, there is no one else, when i am with her i have no doubts that i want to spend the rest of my life with her, when i am with her i am scared and happy, she is the magic that fills my life!

When we were together i was not the perfect partner, no, i know it, i can say it, i had so many flaws, why??? because i was to self centered, because i believe the fact i was there was almost enough, i didnt do enough, this drives me mad, but i learn my lesson, if one day happiness comes to me, i will be amazing!!!

I never know who reads my blog, i know almost no one, but if you do, and you are looking for the special person, dont have an agenda, dont think about your work, dont think about your sport, dont think about how was your life before, no, free yourself, free yourslef for love, embrace love, dont look back, you can be not paying attention to the best thing that will touch your life!!!

take risk, be bold, be brave, be a partner, be some one who will be a force for good, for love, life is so fast, you dont want to lose the person who means everything to you!!!! i know how this feels, i know i have in Anna the women of my life, i know this, i feel in my heart, and i also so know i maybe never have her love again...dont do it like me, dont walk in hell, dont fight the demons, sometimes we think we need cars, houses, money, no, we just need true love, we just need to soulmate, we just need a person to share our lifes with!!!

you ask, hey, are you blind??? what about all the divorces?? cheating?? separations??? i know, i see them every day, i see also people who stop, people who stop sharing, who stop making an effort, so decide about choosing to change the material life insted of love!!!!! maybe i am just a stupid romantic hopeless man!!! maybe i am the last of my kind...but i believe in what i say, i do what i say, i life according to this!! there is nothing i say in here i would do different, i am not saying one saying here, and life a different life, no i live like i write, and its not easy!!!!

its not easy at all, but i cannot live in another way, my special one, my one, simply by touching my life made me a better person, made me a human person, made me feel for others, made me understand better live, made me look at them the obvious, made me look inside my soul....when you have some one who touch like this, you know you find your own, so please, please, dont made the same mistake as me, you have the most important treasure of your existance, you have love from the ONE!!!!! you should have only one mission in life, to make sure you both are walking this life side by side, and every day, every morning, every moment, you know...i have my love, i have the person of my life with me, is not this the most important thing in our lives?????

i found my one, i found true love, and i have to live without it, its the biggest challenge in life, but i will never quit, so fight, keep, improve your love!!!!

there is nothing more important them love!!!