Why i say this? When i start a life with my love i have been living alone for a while, with a series of rules and ideas that were drilled into me by life!! Be tough, be never go back on your word, you are in command!! This is fine if you are a drill sergeant, training some recruits for the army!!!
This doesn’t apply to a family life with a little child and women you love!!! Don’t do the same mistake as me!!! being strict over a minor thing is not good, it’s just a stupid power game you play that leads to nothing, just lead the person you love to start asking herself, why do I love this guy??? And don’t foul yourself, she may love you 100% but she will always love more her child!!!
Why we do this?? Why we don’t listen? why don’t we stop and say, this is not my child, i am not the father, the child have a father, I should be a friend, a sort of uncle, yes, play a role, a supportive role for the mother, be a rock for the mother when times are difficult, not be a new sort of stress and problems!!
This was a sort of problems that lead to the biggest strain in your relationship, and I bring them to me, me by being stupid, I clear remember a BBC programme saying, you should use the same approach to toddler like the one you use to train pets, punishment and reward! What a joke!!!!!!! Kids are not cats or dogs!!!! i know this now, i know this the hard way, so please don’t do the same mistake as me!!!
if you are in a similar situation, play a supportive role, have a serious talk with the women you love, ask her what she thinks, discuss with her, don’t try to push your view, if you don’t agree with something tell her, have a open discussion, but never forget, its her child, in the last case she has the final say!!!
Your there to support her, not challenge her!!! Doesn’t matter what is the subject, love is much more important them your stupid power games!!!
and don’t think a kid of 2 or 3 years is an adult, expect them to cry, to laugh, to cry for reason you don’t understand, you think are not important, instead of trying to make the child tough, or going away because you don’t understand, learn to love a child, read, get informed!!!! buy books about kids...did I do this? no...and I cannot tell how much I regret that!!!
In a relationship the most important rule is balance, in a case like this when your partner already have a child, you should not try to impose yourself, you should be her wingman, her support system, don’t try to impose your rules and opinion!!!! Love her, and be FLEXIBLE!!!!!
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